A touch of failure...

Well after trumpeting about my new discipline I promptly stopped posting on any of my blogs... maybe I could argue I gave up blogging (inflicting my bright ideas on the world) for Lent.

Anyway in the meantime life has been moving on... I have a small contract facilitating an online community, am working 10 hours or so a week in a local yarn store and am gradually recovering from the last few years of being a public servant!

One of my amazing acheivements has been to complete this cardigan which I started about June last year. What is so incredible about this? Only that I think the last time I actually completed a knitting project for myself was in about 1988 - if not before. The last thing I remember clearly was a mohair jersey I started during our OE in the UK which I don't think I finished until we got home. It is also the first knitted thing I have finished (if you dont count the six month old baby jersey I haven't sewn up yet i.e. not finished) since... possible since we moved to Wellington (15 years) and I went back to full time work. I have a number of UFO's but I can't recall a completing anything - partially because my MIL has been there to meet the kids urgent requests.

As well as the cardigan I have also been working on a pair of socks - largely due to the degree of hassle I've been getting from my mother and elder daughter about my wimpiness with double pointed needles and this photo is proof for both of them that I have successfully turned the heel. I must admit as my stitch a day calendar suggests they are a nice portable project that despite the fineness of wool does grow quite quickly. I think I am also getting slightly inspired by the new colourways that we unpacked at the shop last week!
And then last but not least my next cardigan project which started with me making the effort to remember the one needle cast on - I do believe I am turning into a knitter again. Of course the ultimate irony in completing the cardigan and starting on the second one (which was actually an older stash of wool from two years ago) is that the cardigan concept was so I'd have something cuddly and warm to put on when I got home and took off my suit jacket from work! Ah well, never mind...

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Implementing my new discipline

I've decided if I'm serious about this writing thing I better make sure I do some every day and of course this is my most random blog so what better place to start.

I was reading an article in a writer's magazine yesterday about having a place to write and I have been thinking about that. I suspect my procrastination today will be cleaning out the spa room as one option and the front lounge is also pretty cluttered with Tash's stuff. It's my age old habit of clearing the decks before I create!

It's kind of frustrating in a way that I am not getting a lot done during the day - housework and busywork stretching to fill the available time. And it doesn't help that I dont have a strong sense of urgency about earning any money at the moment - the stillness of not having to be anywhere or do anything is a wonderful space.

Of course there are things to do and say - and that's why I want to get some space sorted so I can get into the habit of contributing and playing online again. In the back of the mind there is the thought that it will be easier once Toby is back at university and Tash is off to London and my house will be properly my space during the day. In the meantime here are two beautiful photos from my cellphone of Arthur's Pass in the weekend.

So its raining outside

My bag is pretty much packed for a trip down to Christchurch with Tash and I'm sitting semi watching Antiques Roadshow on the Living Channel. It's already 11 oclock and I should be finishing off a proposal which might contribute to my moving back into the world of gainful employment. Today was a bit of a late start as I didn't get back from the gym (that's four days this week!) until just after nine.

It's great having my laptop back! Not the least because it lets me capture random thoughts. Yesterday at the gym I was listening to a audio book version of Stephen Covey's The Eighth Habit. He was talking about the change between the industrial age and the knowledge age and how many businesses still operate under the industrial age principle where machinary and plant (capital) has value and people are replacable. Whereas in a knowledge economy the value of a business is in the knowledge of the people who are working there. He also talked about co-dependency of dysfunctional thinking that reflects that and how most people when hearing him talk about it tend to think how someone else should really be listening to this.

So to resist being co-dependent (as I was contemplating previous places of work as I listened) I thought about what that might mean if I applied it to me. It's quite difficult to put into words but it seems to translate that people aren't easily replaceable and in fact that I am uniquely knowledgable and valuable - there isn't anyone who can do what I do, the way I do it, because it depends on my brain and how I synthesise and organise information and ideas. This has all kinds of consequences as how we value ourselves and our skills - but given the pervasive dysfunction the cynic in me wonders if it matters that much.

Total distraction - there is this elderly lady on AR with two "odds and ends" from her mother's sewing cupboard. One is an engraved silver bodkin which she uses and the valuer has just said that it was made in 1649! And he can't identify the maker from the hallmark because the records were destroyed in the great fire of London! The other was a little tool for skeining thread which was dated at about 1720. (and the combined value was 700-800 pounds!)

To new beginnings

My plans to keep up with my blog were rather de-railed when a lightening storm blew out the Vodafone reciever in Arthurs Pass! So there went my internet connection and phone for several days. Then when I got back home and to work there was only three weeks to go before my contract expired which meant my focus at home was my CV and job applications. To compound it all I am still waiting for my replacement laptop which is cramping my style as well.

Anyway last Thursday was the end of my contract and after seven and a bit years I am no longer a public servant so I'm up to reflecting on what my next steps will be. I'm pacing myself a bit until Jon gets settled back into school and a planned weekend in Christchurch.

The Place of Returning

I dont think I blogged about it at the time but back in October when I visited my sister in mid-Canterbury I had a really strong sense of how much rural New Zealand was part of me and how much I missed it. This could be the advancing nostalgia of old age but the feeling didn't totally go away. Naturally it returned as we drove up to Arthur's Pass today.

I was thinking how I didn't mind rain when we were arriving at the Pass - although I discovered a modifier for that - I dont mind SOME rain... It was bucketing down when we arrived and although it has lightened a bit , not enough for me to undertake my "reconnisance ritual" where after unpacking I go for a walk - usually alone - and touch base with all the places that make this place, a place of origin, a home that will always be that no matter how I live away.

Surprise moments

I got a surprise today when I went out to have a look at the gardening my housekeeper had done in lieu of vacuuming yesterday and discovered this mass on poppies. They are proper Anzac poppies and look so beautiful. They are got a lot taller than the others and the blue cornflowers are just starting to flower around them. They aren't perhaps in the right place given the wildflower effect but they are still stunning.

The roses are also beginning their dazzling show although the hot weather today has meant that they are already beginning to blow. I need to get out with some more fertiliser and the secataurs to dead head them.

What I did in my days off

This is a pretty quick post as I am about to send the link out and I want it to look like I have been here recently - which I have - story for later but I tried to stay away from the computer a bit in my first set of non working days.

But we did progress with the decorating! The photo with the new carpet is slightly bluer than it actually is and the photo with the paint chips is a bit washed out but you can get the idea.

Nick wanted to get a colour consultant involved for some advice on making everything work together. She came over to see me on Friday morning and I was able to borrow a sample of the new carpet for her to look at (so got the photo). The paint chips are on a curtain sample that is very close to the carpet tones. At the moment - the colour at the top of the group is Resene's Spicy Pink which is Ana's choice for her room, the hallways and probaly the office/spare room will be Merino (the light chip at the bottom, the big lounge and entry way will be Resene Nautilus (the chip to the right of the deep red) the TV room will go a shade or two deeper to Chilli Red (the paint chip is actually paprika) Then Jon is going for a Duluk colour (I think it is Benmore or the shade above). We are tossing up doing the walls behind the kitchen cupboards a deep toning teal (which is the other paint chip) Although the decorator is suggesting we do it as a feature wallpaper wall which Nick is a bit allergic too!

Toby's room will also have a feature wall - to be decided.

It has been great having a sounding board for the colours and having the time Friday and Monday to get quotes and check out samples and colours.